I see you...

I do.
Every single one of you.
And I think about you.
About what could have been had you seen it in you too.
Had you been willing to give it more time, more attention, more heart.
If you'd quit listening to the outside voices and the inside voices too that told you this wouldn't work.
I think about the bills you could have paid off. The trips you could have taken. The lives you would have changed. The stories you would have had a hand in creating.
I see momma's who wanted better for their kids. I see women who desired connection & friendship. I see wanderers who couldn't wait to travel the world.
I see moments where past failures tainted the new opportunity.
Where self doubt spoiled the brewing potential.
Where mismanaged time become "I don't have enough of it."
I see you.
And it makes my heart ache.
Because it's in those moments, when I see you "checking out" of your dreams that I wonder what would have happened if those before me had done the same.
If the ones who pursued better for their own self had "checked out" before I had the chance to see what it could do for me.
Would we be here or would we still be swimming drowning debt & "insufficient funds" notices?
Would I still be lonely and depressed & aching for connection?
Would my daughter's have an example of doing things differently in their lives?
Would my marriage have even survived?
Would we have made it to new countries or even across our own?
Would we be living here? Driving this? Doing these things?
Would I even be a dreamer anymore?
What would have happened?

But they didn't. They didn't quit.
They pursued, pressed on & tried harder.
They worked for 'yes' when all they were getting were 'no'.
They ignored the "that will never work" and showed them that it would.
They did not check out on their dreams, but chased them with roaring passion.
Because they knew they were worth it. No matter the cost. No matter the fleeting moments of disappointment. No matter how long it would take. No matter what hills had to be climbed or what awkward "come to Jesus" moments it took with a leader who loved them.
They saw something in them that fueled them forwards and somewhere down the line, I saw it in me too. The hope for something greater and the courage to chase it.

So I see you.
and I still cheer for you.
And I still wonder what could have been...
If you'd only see it in you too.